1 Never under any circumstances take your spouse (or significant other) on the road with you for more than 24 hours at a time

2 Never work directly for a band or artist (try a Sound, Light or Production Company, much steadier work)

3 Never turn your back on anything of value on the road

4 When confronted with an insurmountable odds, improvise (Gaffer's tape always helps)

5 All headliners started out as opening acts, in most cases, they will be opening acts again someday

6 Anybody can go see a band that's "popular", it's only special when you see a band before they are popular (see rule 13)

7 Have your salary sent home, live off your per diem

8 Plan for the worst, hope for the best

9 Everything happens for a reason

10 Get the money before the show

11 Never under estimate the value of dumb ass luck

12 Always trust your first instinct

13 Never try to predict which artists will be stars, you will be wrong well over half the time

14 Whenever given an opportunity to take a shower, do it

15 Never Assume... Never

16 On a tour bus or motorhome always remember..... If you want to pee, that's OK with me. Anything more.......and you're OUT THE DOOR!! submitted by Dave "Blast" RFL & Jeffrey "Skip"

17 Treat the Crew the way you always wished someone would treat you, or one night you wont have a show... submitted by Dave "Blast" RFL

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Other Rules

Never lend a band member money (submitted by Sneaky Pete)

Never believe that the stage plot faxed into the office late last night will be accurate (submitted by Vanessa)

Never for a moment believe that anything onstage is loud enough (submitted by Vanessa)

Just bring enough food for yourself, if you bring enough for the whole crew there wont be enough for you (submitted by Stealth4)

One hour of sleep in a real bed is better than three hours of sleep in the front seat of the truck (submitted by dwali

The bands abiltiy to hear the monitors is inversely proportional to the number of years they've been playing. (submitted by bunnerabb)

A battery in a mireless mic will only fail during the performance, not sound check. (submitted by bunnerabb)

Any time which you think that you may have gained for set-up by arriving at the venue early will be eaten up my some techincal problem which will arise just after load-in. (submitted by bunnerabb)

House supplied loaders and spot operators will have never, ever, ever done this before. (submitted by bunnerabb)

The rider is a wish list. Nothing more. (submitted by bunnerabb)

If you are a vegetarian, bring your own food. Unless you can live on lettuce and tomatoes from the deli tray. (submitted by bunnerabb)

Always bring a Power Distribution rig with a 150' feeder cable to club shows. 2 - 20 amp circuits are not enough and all club wiring sucks. (submitted by bunnerabb)

The tuner in the equipment van's radio will fail roughly 2 shows after it's cassette deck eats your favourite tape and ceases to operate forever. Buy a discman. (submitted by bunnerabb)

The man trying to sell you marijuana backstage is Narcotics Division officer from the local constabulatory. Offer him some soda and smile a lot. (submitted by bunnerabb)

Carry spare everything. (submitted by bunnerabb)

Cellular phones will kill you financially. Get a calling credit card. (submitted by bunnerabb)

If the artist you're working with is a complete jerk, don't go off on them. Find a way off of the tour but get another gig first. They're never to going to say anything nice about you so leave it off of your resumé and move
on. (submitted by bunnerabb)

Don't say you know how to something that you don't. you will invariably be asked to do it. (submitted by bunnerabb)

All directions suck and will land you in either Wyoming, the Bronx, or Amsterdam. Get an addres